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Of Kirpan, British Airways & matters of faith

Carrying of kirpan could be a basic tenet of Sikhism, but you just can’t carry it any where. That’s what 31-year-old Ripudaman Singh found out when he was arrested while visiting the US embassy in Copenhagen in 2004. A court now has upheld his conviction for violating Danish arms laws.

Religious affiliation should be confined home and places of workship. If it spills over to the streets, classrooms and workplaces there is a huge possibility of clashes. And those clashes wouldn’t be just of civilizations, it would be of cultures as well as perceptions. A knife may be a religious symbol, but it is definitely offending for many.

So symbols of offence in the tag of religion breeds animosity in a public place rather than the avowed theme of love and brotherhood which almost all religions claim to propagate and rarely do.

How many Sikhs would you see sporting kirpans in a busy Chandigarh avenue?
So why do you want to flaunt your religious affiliations? The only reason could be that you are unsure of it.

A British Muslim teacher was shown the door for wearing the niqab. The decision was challenged, but a tribunal upheld it.

Similarly, British Airways packed off its employee for wearing a necklace with a cross. Not enough. Rather unfair. Because the airline allows employees to wear bangles, turban and headscarves. Will BA allow a kirpan onboard?

Since anything and everything related to Hindus are symbols, most of them offending for faithless souls, nothing need to be told about that.
Flaunting your religion may not be the ideal thing to do, except some in medieval societies etched in modern history. Like oil rich Saudi. And the lawless, porous Waziristan on the Pak-Afghan border.

Redemption is a long way off.

Crocodile tears for Azhar

Who decides the fate of sportspersons found guilty of misconduct on and off the field? Sports bodies, governments or the law of the land. Ideally it should be a combination of all, since the framework of laws did not clearly envisage situations like match fixing.
So a cricketer like Mohammad Azharuddin, who is a class act to watch while on a flow, was slapped a life ban in 2001 on match fixing charges, along with Ajay Sharma. Ajay Jadeja and Nikhil Chopra got a five year ban.
The probe was conducted by the country’s top investigator K Madhavan. Obviously, there’s little scope for an error.
Now given the intriguing politics that stalks the Board of Control for Cricket in India and its uneasy love-hate relationship with ICC, the BCCI has decided to honour the tainted captain.
The reasons are innocuous: BCCI says other cricket boards do not come down so heavily on its erring stars. If that is the case, the way out is not to award a honor for an erring cricketer but to take up the matter at appropriate levels so that there are no double standards.
What if the court exonerates the fallen Indian idol in future? Well then give him a hero’s welcome.

But statements of various BCCI functionaries on the issue goes off track to mention contracts awarded to South African and London based firms. So clearly the matter is not coming to the rescue of a fallen icon, but the lure of money. Not done.

The Generation X hyperbole

Gandhigiri is sweeping the country. For starters, it is the Gandhian equivalent of Dadagiri. For the discerning, its just a hyperbole revolving around popular Bollywood flick Lage Raho Munnabhai.
Munnabhai is the local loafer who thinks the significance of October 2 is that it is a dry day.
But then you just don’t expect small-time connoisseurs of Santhara (Country liquor) to give a lecture on Gandhian economy.
The new generation has finally connected with Mahatma Gandhi through Munnabhai’s latest incarnation, according to a section of the media.
It is not the case.
Generation X has no urge to connect with a social icon of the past. And no compelling reason too.
They are just celebrating the Sanjay Dutt flick and the unwarranted media attention that comes with it.
Gandhi would have no reason to complain, though. It doesn’t hurt anyone.

The Hindu face of terror?

It seems the new face of terror has a Hindu tag to it.

Investigators probing the Malegaon blasts are pursuing leads which hint at links with fringe outfits related to the Bajrang Dal and the Malegaon multiple blasts.

While this remains to be proven, the authorities are proving to be ultimate dumbheads.

Police had information that the Mosque had a threat. Despite this security was minimal for the Friday prayer.

A former MLA too had told the Superintendent of Police that the Badi Masjid could be attacked.

Three of the four blasts occurred near the Mosque.

Whether or not the culprits are brought to book, there has to be some explanation from the police about the sloppy way the force dealt with the threat perception.

And responsibility should be fixed.

Coming back to the new face of terror, Hindus (Not the Sangh Parivar) would do well to accept the fact that terror is not confined to Muslim ghettos.

Only by accepting it, rather than dubbing it as a political or social tirade against a community, can it be tackled.

Muslims carry the uneasy burden of terror masterminds even now because an overwhelming majority failed to condemn acts of terror just because the perpetrators belonged to the community.

That logic is skewed, because no civilised society can accept acts of terror.

Blasts in Malegaon now; Expect riots soon

At least 30 persons were killed at Malegaon in Nashik district of Maharashtra in blasts that occurred near a mosque.

There is no wonder. Expect riots soon.

Consider these: There is a raging debate about singing Vande Mataram.

A verdict in the 1993 Mumbai blasts is expected soon. The Uttar Pradesh election is due soon. And the BJP is in total disarray.

Don’t you see a perfect setting for blood on the streets. Do you think those singing Vande Mataram would be more patriotic than those who do not? That is what many people think.

But what the BJP is going to tell the Uttar Pradesh electorate is not exactly that. What the BJP is going to tell the UP electorate in no uncertain terms is that those who oppose the mandatory singing of Vande Mataram are anti-nationals.

All anti-nationals are Muslims, the BJP would gladly swear. And all Muslims are terrorists by birth as well as anti-nationals by nature.

Do you see a recipe for a riot in the aforementioned lines?
If not, you are ignorant. Or it is in your convenience to feign ignorance.

This is a nation born in bloodshed. And blood will continue to flow as long as ignorance is the mantra of a vast majority. And that will be ensured by our political class, Right, Left and Centre. Jai Hind.

The history of hypocrisy, Hitler & sensitivities of a Cross

Can a restaurant be named Hitler’s Cross? It seems it can’t because sensitivities are involved. Not of Jews persecuted by Nazis alone, but of those who are dead against persecution of any form.

Six million people were slain by the Nazi thug and so no symbols associated with him -- the name nor the Swastika --can be a cause of a celebration – In this case a celebration of dining.

The place in question is a restaurant in Navi Mumbai (Or New Bombay) which was named Hitler’s Cross.

The Khargar restaurant owner is not a Nazi fan or an opponent of Jews; he just wanted to attract attention, it seems. So do we have the right to attract attention by using offending symbols as a tool?

As a matter of debate and on an idealistic platform the answer is yes, but as the perspective is based on the progress of society as a whole the answer can only be no.

The distinction between fact and fiction, historical perspective and history, racial profiling and radicalism is so blurred that there can be opponents and proponents in the same measure.
It is a thin blood line that separates all these.

From the Third Reich to the controversial Khargar restaurant, history’s tide is swung by extreme postures, whether it is Right of Left. There is no place for another line of thinking. Isn’t that insensitivity?

The Khargar restaurant’s owner bowed to sentiments to rename it Cross Café. Now isn’t Cross a symbol of sacrifice?

Carry on debating, but the Cross Café has grabbed all the attention in Earth and Mars that it no longer needs publicity of any sort.

Figure this out: Elated by the renaming, the secretary of Beth-El synagogue in Panvel, Naomi Massil, hopes to visit it soon. No one is complaining.

Ameesha Patel, SRK & the eulogy of duds

If Bollywood actress Ameesha Patel creates a ruckus at the Airport and starts flinging dirty words on airline staffers how do you think the issue should be dealt with?

She should be treated with kid gloves, according to an HT mus (e) ing, because, we are reminded, she is a celebrity.

If Dean Jones calls a bearded cricketer a terrorist, he would have been just making an off-the-cuff remark, many eminent former Australian cricketers and Harsha Bhogle tell us.

So what if this poor bearded soul with no religious tag were to barge into the HT office in Mahim and start hurling abuses at this apology of a reporter solely because what ever was written was supposedly blasphemous?

Would she invoke the celebrity status to shut her ears and pass off as she wants the airline staffer to do just because the Patel in question was Ameesha?

Sad. Duds just occupy plum positions or perceived plum positions to abuse it.

There is no end to this nonsense.

Shah Rukh Khan tells us that even mothers’ milk is contaminated. Can we all raise a pesticide toast please?

Carry on bunking Brits.

It seems the 3 Rs are being relegated to the backyards by the British.

One out of three employers have confessed to the Confederation of British Industry that they were forced to send staffers for what they call remedial training in reading, writing and Arithmetic. Not bad new for desi BPOs.

Now you know why jobs are coming to India.

The only surprise is that the British are not only poor in Maths, but also their mother tongue.

Sad, because the price they pay or the amount the British economy loses due to this is a cool 10 billion pounds.

That is Rupees 87319966111. Not all that is coming to India, but the significant chunk is.

So Britons, carry on bunking school, because half of the employers believed that school dropouts now a days are worse than dropouts five years ago.

And university graduates aren’t doing better.

Their works are “peppered with grammatical & spelling errors”. That is why the BPO cash counters in India are ringing louder.

Sweet water & the city-state dreams of Mumbai

Exhibiting characteristic ambivalence, the Vilasrao Deshmukh government woke up to the mystery water, which drew hordes of people to Mahim from all over the state, after a night of idiotic frenzy.

The CM warned the people against drinking the sweet water. Government agencies followed suit. The point is that, like last July’s deluge, it was a bit too late, though no disaster happened so far. But what if the water was poisoned? No need to guess.

The Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation, the richest municipal body in the country whose budget exceeds the proportions of many small state governments, said late on Saturday that the water was unfit for drinking. Thanks very much.

And the revelation is that it contained low levels of salt, which could be the reason why it was dubbed sweet. It could be “ an upsurge of ground water” as the state Pollution Control Board says or low levels of salt as BMC claims. But the authorities failed to comb the area to prevent people from flirting with danger.

In a megapolis like Mumbai too many authorities hold jurisdiction over the civic domain. This makes it easy for a free-for-all passing the buck game, if the sweet water were to assume dangerous proportions. Sena-ruled BMC can blame government and government can wash its hands off the Mahim creek itself.

A teeming megapolis like Mumbai needs a different kind of governance and cannot be run under the guidance of a State Government just because it is headquartered here or a Civic body, which is just a battle ground of electoral politics. This is another country carved out of every part of the vast nation that is India. A wonderland turning into a graveyard. Remnants of a dream republic.

The moral of the story is that Mumbai cannot anymore be treated as the capital city of Maharashtra. Mumbai and Maharashtra are two distinct entities. Mumbai is a city-state akin to Singapore. Now, can we have a BMC/Govt joint panel to visit Singapore please?

*****************************************************
For the academic inclined.

Maharashtra Pollution Control Board’s logic:

The sweet water could be a result of an upsurge of ground water, resulting from heavy rainfall. Due to heavy rains, ground water may get fully charged and exert excess pressure, causing cracks in the rocky bottom. Ground water tends to come out through these cracks. Since it is lighter than fresh water it will float on the surface.

Another miracle in Mumbai, as water turns sweet in Mahim

Click here for the latest on the mystery sweet water


Eleven years after Ganpati drank milk, it is the turn of water to turn sweet at Mahim in Mumbai on August 18. Thousands of Mumbaikars are flocking towards Mahim.

The mysterious sweet water appeared from the sea near the shrine of Baba Maqdoom Dargah at Mahim

People started pouring into the spot around 5.30 pm in the evening on Friday, August 18.

People also started collecting the mystery water in bottles.

The majority of people who have come to Mahim to collect the mysterious water are Muslims, media reports said.

Police and local authorities have not bothered to intervene.

(More)

There’s no fizz in the bloody investment talk

Make no mistake, Pepsi, Coca-Cola are in the back-foot and no investments would be reviewed by multi-national firms due to the setback for Colas.


The usual ranting of multi-nationals reviewing investments in India in the wake of action against some states following the alarming revelations by Centre for Scientific Studies should just be ignored.

No sensible MNC would want to ignore a huge opportunity that is India, the only bigger market in the world being Communist China.

In the past few weeks, Wal-Mart, the world’s largest retailer, bowed to the dictates of All China Federation of Trade Unions to allow five trade unions at the organisation’s stores. Wal-Mart has 50 stores which employs 31,000 people in China.

No outburst has come from Wal-Mart after the decision because they know it is the only way they can tap the huge market in China. So there is no use dangling any carrot or stick. Either you accept it or get lost is the Chinese mantra.

Even Google, which swears by privacy laws and defends its right to protect search information in US, bowed to the Chinese regime, though it is another matter that Google’s China search engine could not make much impact against a Chinese competitor.

So if Kerala bans sale and production of Coca-Cola and Pepsi, Wal-Mart wouldn’t shelve its plans to set foot in India. Wal-Mart would only be happy to set shop in Kerala sans Pepsi, Coke. It can mint money from selling anything, not just colas, rather than not being able to set shop at all.

In fact it is aggressively lobbying for that purpose because it doesn’t make business sense to show camaraderie by pulling out or ignoring a huge market to swear allegiance to a firm just because it happens to be multi-national.

Likewise, just because they are multi-nationals and are endorsed by a greedy bunch of Bollywood stars, Coke and Pepsi cannot just have a free-run.

It makes common sense to understand that it is possible or rather easy to live without Colas. They are not vital and hence can be ignored rather than risk a health hazard from a buyers point of view. For the Colas, ignoring India or set backs even in its regional pockets is a huge blow.

So Coca-Cola and Pepsi are at a disadvantage now and not the Indian market vis-à-vis investment potential as is made out to be in sections of media. It is as simple as the fizz when Cola bottles are opened.

Are you listening Indra Nooyi ?

Another Veerappan dies; a newspaper lives on with a design to kill journalism

Contributed By An Unknown Blogger

When editorial freedom in newspapers is curtailed – or cultured – to suit marketing avarice, journalism becomes a game of monkey landing.

And this why The Times of India went nuts with the story headlined'New Veerappan Arrives' (Page-one lead, Bangalore edition and nationpage story in other editions, August 9).

The Bandipur dateline story without a byline proclaimed the arrival ofthe 'new Veerappan,' a 45-year-old man called Imbali Jose from Wayanad district of Kerala, in the Nilgiris jungles.

Jose, TOI told us, isjust as bad as Veerappan and the police want him dead or alive. "Onrecord, however, they refuse to name him, acknowledge him or even talkabout him.

They say they want to kill him first and talk later," itsaid.So, it is a story of inside information, eh? The story that quotes KSNChikkerur, IGP (Karnataka CID, Forest Cell) as saying something "in aprobable reference to Jose," is also reassuring:

"But don't let himbother you… We will get this poacher and his gang. We will also getthose poachers and their gangs. I assure you they will all look thesame when they are dead" Chikkerur told The Times of India.

It also quotes a certain Tito Joseph of the Wildlife ProtectionSociety of India. "Jose, 45, leads a gang that has 6-15 men fromWayanad district of Kerala. The gang members are good marksmen; theyare known to bring down tuskers with one shot at the temple. It isalmost like a trademark shot of the gang,'' says Tito.

The story makes one confession, though: "There is no ready informationon Jose," proclaims the reporter (or the desk person who apparentlystruggled in vain to thrust some credibility upon the story).

"Thisreport – the first on him – is based on information pieced togetherfrom various official and unofficial sources in Kerala, Karnataka andDelhi."Here is some ready information: Jose died. On August 9. The same dayTOI went to town with its flyer exclusive.

But contrary to whatChikkerur said, Jose did not look the same as Veerappan when he died.He didn't have a hole in his head. He died after prolonged illness.With his wife and children by his bedside.

He was in a hospital whenthe Karnataka police were hunting for journalists to buy theJose-Veerappan-ruling-Nilgiris-jungles story.

Here is his obituary:August 9/ Pulpalli (Wayanad, Kerala): Sasimala Imbalil Jose (48), died after prolonged illness on August 9.A small-time poacher accused in a 1997 case of being in possession ofa tiger skin at the Kozhikode bus depot, Jose had been in hospital forseveral months, even as tales of his poaching in Nilgiri junglesfilled the Karnataka police files.

A year ago, Jose started losing his eyesight. Six months ago, he lostboth his eyes. Soon, both his kidneys failed. He died of renalfailure. He is survived by his wife Elsi and sons Joshi and Jobi.

Thefuneral was held at the Sasimala Infant Jesus Church at 10 am onAugust 10. An English Daily on August 9 reported that Jose was actively poachingin the Niligiri jungles where once Veerappan ruled.

A friend who went to Jose with a faxed copy of the newspaper report ended up consoling the bereaved family.

Two officials from the Karnataka Forest Cell rushed to Jose's house to ascertain his death.Post script:Jose was into poaching. But he was no Veerappan.

Probably hecontracted some infection in the jungles. He was fighting death, notkilling elephants for at least a year, while the Karnataka Forest Cell invented a badly needed villain.

Such stories as appeared in TOI appear on Indian newsprint because:

1) The management does not allow reporters to investigate, for the fear of hurting sacred cows who are really milch cows for theadvertisement honchos.

2) The paper needs exciting stories to survive (till journalism dies), but not at the cost of biting the udder too hard.

So, Veerappans who don't release advertisements to newspapers are invented.

3) TOI knows all of the above better than others.

Half-fit Sachin just doesn’t fit in Indian Team

Agreed that Sachin Tendulkar is a champion. But If Tendulkar is not 100 per cent fit, he has no place in the Indian cricket team.

Remember the outcry for dropping a plump Ronaldo during Brazil’s World Cup campaign? Carlos Alberta Peirrera stood by Ronaldo’s glowing career record, but the damage was done.

The team failed to perform as a unit and the gifted Ronaldhino was a shadow of his impeccable self, juggling and jostling too much only to lose possession too many times.

May be Ronaldhino’s conscience was torn between performing his duties to his national side and having to check his flowing skills, purportedly for to play second fiddle to Ronaldo. Brazil lost the world cup just because they had to massage the inflated ego of a former superstar.

If Sachin Tendulkar can’t throw from the deep, he would have to stick to the circle.

Now that is a tricky situation. One it compromises the captain’s options on the field.

Bowling Sachin with a half-baked throwing arm would be a dangerous proposition if the opposition is in full flow or if India is bowling second.

So Sachin’s utility value boils down to a batsman. Now, if he can’t unleash a flurry of shorts due to his injury, then it would mean he would not be playing his natural game.

While playing a controlled game, Sachin is not the best of performers. It is not his cup of tea. For that, we have the ever reliable Raul Dravid.

And remember Sachin was upset when Rahul Dravid declared the innings when he was nearing his double ton. So personal records matter for this champion.

Now, if Sachin were to slow down after his eighties or 40s, Rahul Dravid can’t have the option of declaring because it is a one day game.

Now, do we wan’t a burden of mind games to be forced on a World Cup bound skipper and team just to include a half-fit champion. The answer should be no.

Our hero has let us down by announcing himself available for selection.

Global brands, Indian menace

Pepsi, Coke contain pesticides, so keep guzzling them with Amitabh, Shah Rukh, Sachin and Aamir

In a global survey of top hundred brands done by Business Week, Coca-Cola topped the list of beverage brands and Pepsi came 22nd. Fair enough, but what is unfair is the ease with which these global giants flout norms, or exploit the lack of it, in the emerging market of India.

Three years after a ruckus in the country over high pesticide levels in various brands of these softdrink majors, which turned out to be a sham and culminated in the formation of a parliamentary committee, 57 samples of 11 soft drink brands from 25 plants spread across 12 states found a cocktail of three to five pesticides in them.

The contamination levels were almost 24 times more than that stipulated by the Bureau of Indian Standards. So much for exhaustive statistics.

The point here is that this could not happen anywhere except this dumping ground called India, where celebrity Bollywood stars would shamelessly fall for the megabucks thrown to them as peanuts by the cola majors to vociferously endorse them.

Aamir Khan, Sachin Tendulkar, Shah Rukh Khan, Amitabh Bachchan and all those star brand ambassadors can’t care a damn about the alarming insensitivity of these multinational killers. They can’t see through the game because the Greenback has blurred their vision. So don’t think they will stop endorsing colas to our tiny tots. They can’t.

A top health ministry official’s letter to consumer affairs secretary sums up the officialdom’s stand: Bureau of Indian Standards should sit over the standards for beverages it has come up with, till an expert committee deliberates the issue.

Now, everyone knows how expert panels and parliamentary committees work.

Cola majors have just bribed the decision making structure and the opinion makers throughout the country en masse to carry on with impunity the process of exploiting the country’s vast resources and tapping its huge domestic market, with scant regard to universally acceptable norms.

For those who defend the Colas for the sake defending, just think what would have happened in the US or European Union if such a study were to come out?

They will just be banished. That they know and hence they will stick to standards there.
No need to go by that yardstick in India as they could soon gift wrap the colas with the skin of celebrities and the venom of babudom to adorn your neighbourhood shop. Cheers. Amen.

Of human bondage: The ban on child labour in India

If you thought the workforce of India will not have children, defined as those under-14, following a ban by the Union Government, you are a dud.

Take a bet: You will definitely see kids serving you in hotels, innocence in the form of domestic helps and of course beggars, which is a multi-crore profession in Mumbai, India’s supposedly richest metro. Beggars earn Rs 180-crore annually in Mumbai, in case you didn't know.

And you may ask why child labour will flourish despite a joke of a ban.

Because there are over 40 million kids who have never seen a school or just couldn’t waste time to mull over elementary education.

Because even dreaming about food, shelter and clothing is a waste of time for them.

Unlike there fortunate peers, these 40 million kids have to earn a living from the streets to feed their families. They are just thrown out to the cruel struggle which some people call life.

A huge majority of these 40 million work in hazardous industries, which is a recipe for disaster considering their lifestyle as well as inhuman labour conditions .

And the people who run this nation of billion people are notorious for the way they handle rehabilitation programmes.

Will the penalty for flouting the law, which is Rs10,000-Rs 20,000 and a 2-3 year jail term be a deterrent? No.

There are rigorous penalties for various acts of omission and commission which are rarely enforced unless there is a political vendetta behind it in our democratic set up.

The hapless kid is not eligible to vote since he is four years younger than what a our lawmakers think would make them a major. Or mature enough to swallow the whims and fancies of our political masters who run the roadshow called democracy.

Democracy in India means politics; rather politicking. Politicking means power. And in this scheme of things, children of poor parents are just pawns who are in the game by default.

They are doomed. At least till they grow up to be in their own worlds, however murky that may be.

Ground realities of the Indian kind: Jet, Sahara, Hutch, Essar & BPL

Deal-making is as shoddy a work in the emerging market of India as its umpteen television sops aired to make prime time television viewing an ordeal.

The country’s largest airline Jet Airways recently announced a hurried deal to take over Air Sahara, a relatively new player.

Its now common knowledge that the massive valuation of Air Sahara by Jet, just to keep at bay potential suitors including Vijay Mallya, the desi version of Sir Richard Branson, was never in sync with the ground realities.

Air Sahara is just a riddle, not an airline in the strictest sense. It also operates flights.

So the Rs 180 crore Jet paid to Sahara is now as good as a needle lost in the namesake desert. Of course legal battles lie ahead, which is the price for shoddy deal making.

Now, another cracker of a deal is falling apart -- Mobile telephone service providing firm Hutchison Essar-BPL merger in Mumbai circle.

The same reasons that prompted Jet to go for a hurried, short-sighted deal with Sahara has been the underlying principle of the Huchison Essar-BPL drama also – insecurity.

Jet wanted to consolidate its decent presence in the booming aviation industry. Hutch wanted to catch up its ever-losing battle with Airtel.

A better way of dealing with these ambitions was to fine tune its existing operations by playing up its strength rather than swallowing a weak peer.

Jet and Hutchison Essar failed to realize this and rushed through fancy deals which ony caught the fancy of the dealers and shakers in the media. They eventually ended up where they started and perhaps lost some futile crores.

Corporate India has to understand that management strategies churned out in business schools are not sacrosanct. Ground realities are. If only Naresh Goel and his battery of advisors knew that.
And this laconic oneliner should suit future Hutch ads: wherever you go, deal-making is not as cool as the green grass, blue skies and the pug.

Cricket goes for a toss: Close encounters of the 20/20 kind

For some, Twenty Twenty is an invitation for disaster. But cricket itself cannot be isolated from innovative concepts, albeit aimed at minting money by compromising on the core values of a game.

No one can doubt that Twenty Twenty would mean races to the boundaries and more hits above it. This would mean instant joys and instant money as viewers all over would rather watch a game with an ensured result and big hitting rather than a Test which need not necessarily produce a result.

For true connoisseurs of the willow, Twenty Twenty will be a relegation of the nuances of the game to plain hard hitting of the Dhoni kind.

They see scant regard to the skills of a bowler or batsman in this version, which is true. Sincere apologies, but Twenty Twenty is here to stay.

Our right to ridicule...Posterity’s Right To Ridicule

There need not be any right to information for Indians. This is the line of thinking in the United Progressive Alliance, which rules a billion people.

And this comes after enacting a law empowering the citizens to seek exactly the same right.
Declassification of key documents is a routine phenomenon in civilized societies. On June 6, 2006, Nazi era secrets relating to CIA’s murky cold war ties with Nazi Germany were thrown open to the world by the US National Archives.

Needless to say it shows the premier spy agency in bad light.

These documents could not have been shown the light as and when the events which tampered with human conscience unfurled, due to obvious reasons.

It is essential that posterity should have a clear idea of the multitude of the shady and not-so-shady notes and jottings which steered the jittery course of mankind.

After the passage of time, evidence looses its edge as a tool of persecution.

It only retains a verve of curiosity factor, which should be passed on to posterity without fail.

This basic premise, which forms the bedrock of history as well as democracy, is being scuttled by the Indian government.

This subversion of universally acceptable values is unpardonable.

The irony is that if the process of dissemination of information is scuttled, history reinvents itself to sling mud on the perpetrators of such monstrous acts. It is just a matter of time before that happens.

The numb duds presiding over this gory ineptitude do not have much time revel in the comfort zone of suppressed facts.

The legend of Maradona

Just click on this link if there is any

doubt about the greatest

footballer of all times

A call to honour the moles & molls

Moles and molls are an integral part of bilateral ties. A don’s moll is enjoying the comforts of an Indian prison after being extradited.

And a mole in the Prime Ministers Office has been snooping on key information for years, while a former External Affairs Minister chose not to reveal it as it involved the honour of the PMO.

The moral of the culturally nationalistic story is that, in case you come across a mole in the country’s most sensitive office, it would be better to look towards Kandahar and have a Champagne – It could be construed as a toast the released passengers of a hijacked flight and a greeting for the dreaded shenanigans of terror who were freed by a government which boasts of having pursued a policy of hot pursuit, a la Israel.

And then we can toast for POTA, which would have made the terror kingpins shiver. Alas it ain't there.

A special toast to Jayamala, the Kannada actress who swore that she touched the idol at Sabarimala, where females are not allowed after puberty and before menopause. That was magic on her part. Or divine intervention?

Incidentally the temple priest is now facing charges of visiting a whorehouse for lessons on morality.

A toast for the priest too, Mr Jaswant.

Meanwhile, the PMO mole will have his own toasts to make. Cheers.

Mirror hoax

A Mumbai newspaper which claims to be the mirror of the megapolis recently splashed on its cover an exclusive wedding picture of Javed Miandad’s son and Dawood’s daughter.

It turns out that it is neither Javed’s son nor Dawood’s daughter.

It was just an e-mail which did the rounds. How it appeared on the cover is baffling. So much for authenticity.

A couple of days later, a sister concern of the mirror published from Hyderabad carries the same photograph. Well done.

A bureaucratic fiefdom of idiots

AT 5.19 P.M. IST (gmt+5.30) blogspot was back. Can't say if it was even before, but doesn't matter.


Earlier posting

Hello all. These words can’t be seen, in case you are in India.

The Union Government has put a gag order on certain blogs, which was waywardly executed by bureaucracy.

So please hang on till the gag order goes up in flames.

Your friendly neighbourhood blogger

Bombay, 20th July, 2006.

Indian Government terrorises blogosphere

Blogosphere got a jolt after it came to light that Internet Service providers across the nation had barred Blogspot. Bloggers were reporting difficulties in accessing and posting blogs.

And unconfirmed reports say ISPs have been asked to control access to Blogspot simply because SIMI, the outfit being investigated for links with the Serial blasts that shook Mumbai last Tuesday, had used blogs to communicate.

Sources say the government does not intend to block access to any site. The present unavailability has been linked to investigations on the serial blasts . Government agencies are reportedly whetting information available with ISPs.

What transpired at the Zidane-Chirac meet..

The Bombay conundrum: To suspect or not

Serial blasts took away many lives, disrupted rail lines, paralysed Bombay and buried one crucial point in the resultant chaos: Terror is here to stay. Or rather terror attacks.

It is impossible to check terror draped in turbans or bombs concealed in tiffin boxes.

And it has now become imperative to learn how to live with it, regardless of whether its perpetrators are of Hindu or Muslim origin.

That is where civic sense and an alert mind comes into play. Two days after what is now being called 7/11, passengers raised an alarm when they saw four people throwing bags into a creek at Bhayender. Four people were arrested.

Although it is not known if there were bombs inside the bags, the point is that citizens are beginning to watch what everyone else does, with an eye of suspicion. This helps.

For, even if it emerges that there were no bombs, there could be no fickle reason for people to throw bags into a creek. Something murky is bound to be there in that act.

Now what this means is that everyone will view everyone with suspicion in a train and that would add to the tense atmosphere in the overcrowded locals, as they call it in this part of the world.

Fair enough. Its better to be a bit rough than to watch helplessly when blood soaks the tracks.

Mumbai: 150 killed in serial blasts in Western Railway trains (With pictures)

Update 1.45. a.m, July 12: The death toll in serial blasts which rocked Mumbai on Tuesday evening has risen to 150, unconfirmed reports said.

40 bodies have been recovered from a bogie in Jogeswari.

50 died in Mira Road.
More than 300 are injured.

The blasts occurred within a span of eleven minutes. High intensive explosives have been used.

The train in which the blast occurred at Borivali was a Virar fast.

The Prime Minister made a statement at 8.49: We will fight terror, he said.

Union Home Minister Shivaraj Patil said government would take all possible measures. Bu that was about two hours after seven blasts had taken 100 precious lives.

He also condemned the incident.

Chief Minister Vilasrao Deshmukh said the first task is to attend to the injured.

Earlier report below.






Seven blasts rocked Mumbai on Tuesday evening, killing 50.

All the blasts were in the crowded Western line -- Mahim, Matunga, Khar, Bandra, Jogeswari, Borivali, Mira Road.

Trains on western line have been stopped.

Initial reports said first blast was at Khar. Unconfirmed reports now say the first blast was at Matunga Road on the Western line.

Around 40 lakh people commute in the western line.

All the blasts occurred in first class compartments between 6 and 6.30 p.m.



All phonelines have been jammed.

State government authorities have not commented.

The blasts occurred in this order: Bhayender, Mira Road, Borivali, Jogeswari, Bandra, Matunga and Khar.

The Union Cabinet is holding an emergency meeting.

Home Minister Shivraj Patil and Railway Minister Lalu Prasad Yadav are likely to visit Mumbai.

The Union Cabinet is holding an emergency meeting.

Home Minister Shivraj Patil and Railway Minister Lalu Prasad Yadav are likely to visit Mumbai.

And Zizou...

If you thought Zizou would be shoved out from the famed chapters of soccer, you could be as wrong as Napolean was umpteen times when he slogged to solve a mathematical puzzle.

That the son of Algerian immigrants lost his cool in a crucial encounter isn’t taking away the elegance of his effortless playmaking skills.

There definitely was provocation from Italy defender Marco Materazzi, whom the French coach described as the real man of the match. He got Zidane out and sealed the cup for Italy. Well done Materazzi.

And Zidane’s just another example sportsmen losing cool. After McGrath. Maradona. Beckham. And many others.

And that’s why the Golden Ball was truly his.

Racial slur? Tweaking his nipples? No clue.

And word has come from Materazzi that he "insulted" Zidane because he was super arrogant.

Now Zizou, what is it that Materazzi mumbled?

United Holidays of Monsoon

Would you like holidays in summer or monsoon?

The disastrous disaster management plan of the Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation, which kept many people indoors in Bombay during rains and others stranded as usual, has spurred talk of schools being shut in Monsoons rather than in the simmering heat of summer.

It doesn't make much of a difference if holidays are swapped.

If the world were to observe Christmas on April 1 from next year and All Fools Day on America's Independence Day there might be some noises but the majority wouldn't mind.
So those who are irked by the holiness of their purported favourite days can just switch their days and celebrate some other day.

Corporates should also consider the Monsoon vacation plan. Fortunately, if they refuse to take affirmative action on those lines, the BMC think tanks will force them to do that.

That is a win-win situation for all and sundry. So why is it not pouring heaven and earth in Mumbai now.

Do we have to invoke a 26/7 cloudburst to get holidays in monsoon?

The insecurities of super men

Tatas are getting insecure now. The group sees the predatory footprints of Mittal heading towards India.

Why does everyone see a predator in Mittal. May be it is an off-shoot of the ruthless execution of operation Arcelor.

When it comes to their own turf, Indian corporates shelve all talks of liberalization and go on a huddle.

They then demand a level-playing field, a euphemism for protectionism.

That is why Wal-Mart won’t get to spread its giant retail canopy to India till Reliance opens shop in every nook and corner.

And then they talk of disinvestment, another euphemism for giving up profit making government firms at throwaway prices to conglomerates.

Wonder what would have been the government’s issue if it had complete control of Maruti?

Would it have affected the day-to-day running of the nation?

So who in this corporate hell is shying way at this overdose of liberalisation: No need to break your brains, it is your friendly neighbourhood corporate only.

Cant resist saying: This is a nation of hypocrisies, with corporate honchos at its helm.

The final trajectory

So Italy and Germany clash with history in Italy’s side and form and groundswell of support tilting to the hosts.

History really has little impact on a 90-minute game. So Germany is laughing its way to the final, but the Cup winner could still be a dark horse. It is tantalising to bet on Portugual.

Punters have gone for a toss but those who bet for betting’s sake can still make a killing.
So do we have a Germany vs Portugal final or a France vs Italy final?

One thing is sure, two of the four semi-finalists are there at the cost of better teams. So the best team cannot win, and we are not talking about Brazil. They got what they deserved.

The flavour is out

Adios Argentina

Now, the nasty round of predictions come as the flavour has gone out of the World Cup.

Only one thing is sure, Brazil cannot win this cup.

Nostradamus, can you hear this?

A rendezvous with Nostradamus, far from Samba crowd

This poor soul is in the esteemed company of Nostradamus.
Patriotic Spanish journalists bent over backwards to interpret the 16th century author of prophecies.

And they came to the conclusion that Spain is going to win the cup of joy. Whether Nostradamus erred or not, Spain was chucked out of the world cup by an unfancied, struggling French side, which didn’t deserve to be in quarters.

Lesson No 1: Journalists should shun patriotism.

Now, the belly dancers start whipping up euphoria even after freak counter attack goals. And the legion of fans, made up of the a whole lot of ignorant football lovers as well as die hard Zamba loyalists, behave as if it is the party time after a World Cup win.

(Want to know your Brazilian name? Click here)
Jesus Christ! Could some one please tell them that they were playing a poor African nation which has qualified for the first time for the soccer extravaganza. And my foot, if they knew how to finish, the Samba carnival would have been packed off.

Ifs and buts don’t count, only win matters. Why does everyone want Brazil to play good football, asks the Brazilian coach.

If Brazil were just to play for win, which they seem to be heading to, they wouldn’t have much fan following outside Rio De Janeiro.

Coming back to prophecies, mind games don’t work in football it seems. So let’s put logic over artistry, sense over sensation and brain over heart.

If that’s the case, Germany beats Argentina, and no matter who is in semis, advance to win the cup by beating the over-hyped Brazil, if at all they are there.

The samba nonsense will end at least then.

Messi sure is wonder kid, but world cup is for grown ups. Tavez has shown his class.

Thanks Juan Roman Riquelme, it was a privilege watching the midfield artistry – That was sheer class. And Kaisar who wed amid the cup frenzy. And Eusabio.

Sincere apologies to Diego Maradona, simply the best ever. The Best.

World Cup trajectory

Mano di Dios

Quarter 1: Arg vs Ger
Quarter 2: Eng vs Hol
Quarter 3: Italy vs France
Quarter : Brazil vs Spain
Semi: Ger/Arg vs Italy/France
Semi: Eng/Hol vs Brazil/Spain

Finals: Arg vs Brazil/Eng/Hol

And the result is not a guessing game.

The calculations were based on emotional quotient and do not necessarily subscribe to group standings or match fixture. No apologies.

Image: http://www.lionelmessi.org/

Lingering radio waves from the Caribbean

DNA

The God of all things soccer

So what is the big deal, if Germany swamped Costa Rica 4-2. The score line tells a different story, but the real story is that Germans lost the defence twice against minnows. To hell with it, because world cup for some people begins only today, June 10.

The world cup in its present form began for that mould of enthusiasts with the divine Diego Maradona. That was the first world cup in their scheme of things, when Mexico was dazzled by the artistry of the legendary left foot.

So Maradona departed from Mexico with the crown after stamping the greatest goal in football history and invoking the Almighty to give him a helping hand. Football has never been the same after that.

1990 was a disaster of a world cup. It can only be forgotten for its foul play. Argentina lost but the legend remains intact.

20 years after Mexico, World Cup comes back to its blue striped Argentine fans. We hear names which we have never seen – wonder kid Messi, Saviola, Riquelme. And we wait for the ever reliable Crespo. And Juan Pablo Sorin.

Whoever said Samba is football isn’t welcome at this part of the universe. Welcome to the land of all things soccer.

On cloud no 26/7

Rains, which were supposed to lash Maharashtra and throw Mumbai out of gear, did a vanishing act after an initial ahead-of-schedule appearance.

So raincoats are still unwet and rail lines are teeming with life. The average Mumbaikar wants a repeat of 26/7, albiet with a lesser degree of punishment. The simple reason is that they get a paid holiday as the city shuts down.

Only monsoon can do that, now that Shiv Sena is hardly able to manage its own inherent contradictions. Sainiks can barely throw a fit of rage at the drop of a hat.

So the BMC, whose budget is bigger than many Indian states, is ready to fight any deluge. And the communication towers are perfecting the art of making things work in un-manageable conditions -- as if 26/7 was a communication disorder alone.

Mumbai is a city going down the drains, choked with its plastic waste as well as the denizens it draws to its vast man pool.

Redemption is not in sight. Neither is Shanghai, but rains are.

The Da Vinci Code according to Damocles

The Code of Da Vinci was more like a sword of Damocles hanging over the Navi Mumbai theatre in which this poor soul was forced, dragged and cajoled to watch it.

It failed to trigger a shiver. Instead, the Tom Hanks starrer evoked a sense of disbelief at the way fiction was put through the filter of celluloid.

The Code is a disaster of a movie, and the suspense or apparent lack of it has made viewers squirm.

Now that wasn't the intention of the producers or for that matter Dan Brown or Tom Hanks, himself a credible filmmaker.

But the good thing about the code is that it is doing roaring business worldwide, despite the critics slamming it after its much awaited premiere at Cannes.

Now, when the book is a best seller and the adaptation is keenly awaited, expectations about the movie skyrocket.

That could be one reason for the disappointment at some quarters. And for those who haven't read the Da Vinci Code, the movie fails to give any reason to do so. Perhaps it should have
been vice versa. Tough luck.

1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13. Please, no prizes for guessing that this is a Fibonacci sequence. To hell with it.

Click here for hatemails

The great Indian embedded reality show

Protests and the politics of event management in the confines of an idiot box named India



There is a method in madness. There surely is a method in protests, for instance the anti reservation stir.

Protests as a weapon of democracy has a history of defiance. It is the most potent weapon in the armoury of democracy, the life blood of any thriving movement.

The Mahatma was one of the most innovative leaders vis-a-vis protests. He could weave a protest from the most unusual things, for example the humble salt. The salt satyagraha was a huge trigger for masses. It gave the scent of democracy an urge of passion -- it showed how the mighty can be humbled by simple off-beat things.

The Mahatma emerged as what some people now call out of the box thinker; in fact he was simply out of the world for the conventional British savage acts that they couldn't think of any way to tackle the half-naked Fakir.

Mahatma has now been spared from the burden of history as protests gain a new dimension, the dimension of spotlight falling on it -- the spotlight of television crews.

So we now have stage-managed protests to suit the camera angles of the idiot box as we clap in joy when the television beams images of anti-quota protestors being dragged in front of water cannons.

We laugh at the spectacle because the whole thing has drama, but it all looks like a stage-managed television show sponsored by TV channels sprouting in every nook and corner. Television shows have become a cottage industry now.

Recently a stir in Bombay was directed by an event-manager, we are told.

That is where the protestors loose their vital link which can strike a chord with the public, which has to step in to shape the policies which determine their destiny, or at least to trigger the message of the masses to the corridors of power.

The protests staged by anti-quota agitators seem to be managed, evidently by television producers. So while it may appeal to some idiots glued to the TV, it is floating away from the tidal waves of grass root realities.

Dud's guide to Sensex -- a book of joy & laughter

When it comes to losing, people -- with an eye etched on the Bombay Stock Exchange sensitive index, or Sensex as it is fondly referred to -- are not sporting enough it seems.

Investor wealth worth Rs 5,90,000 crore was wiped out in eight trading sessions, according to the information deluge associated with the mystery phenomenon called Sensex.

Why is it a mystery when the whole world sniffs Sensex in every whiff of air that Bombay's polluted horizons offer to its teeming crowds?

Why is it that newspapers decide to let their character go for a toss to accommodate bleeding graphs which show the volatile trajectory of the Sensex the previous day, when, we are told, the bears tamed the bulls at Dalal street.

It is a mystery, because, though the sexy Sensex, even with its slight bumpy ride can wipe out or inject lakhs of crores, that fortune, or wiped out fortune, is concentrated in a select few.

To be somewhat clear what this select few means, it is one per cent of the total population of the world's second most populous country that is ours.

To make matters easy, or rather calculations less painful, let us freeze our population clock at exactly one billion and then take stock of the number of people who dabble in stocks, keep quiet when they rake in a fortune and wipe out planet earth with tears when the market falls. The figure is one crore, in a population of 100 crore.

So ninety-nine per cent of the people doesn't have any direct bearing on whether the Sensex zooms or goes on a tailspin or when there is a meltdown or bear-run or whatever crap.

So when the one per cent is fed with a staple diet of charts and graphs to supposedly guide their path to the fortunes which are just a click away, the rest would rather try and watch a game of cricket.

So when there is pandemonium in Parliament after a jittery ride of Sensex triggered by the whims and fancies of institutional investors or foreign funds or LIC or any goddamn entity, the rest of the 99 crore remains immune.

To go by the street logic, on which the great punters who scent the opportunity to make a killing in every nook and corner also relies, for the Indian retail investor, the stock market is more of a gamble. Or shall we say it is pure gamble, despite a toothless regulator, over cautious government and the circuit filters that lord over the trading sessions.

Gambling is not about winning every time. It is also about losing. May be a 50-50 chance is what conventional logic gives to the forbidden art of gambling.

But then conventional logic would to some extent seek a safe distance from gambling dens also.

So you can't go by convention in gambling. And that is exactly why the pain of losses is more vociferous than the joys with which a fortune is made in a few minutes time.

Figures given above may be far from reality, calculations awry and logic weird. Doesn't matter since figures and facts don't count much for an overwhelming majority of people to whom this aims to cater to, though a majority of people who sift through this debris of market talk could be from the elite one crore club.

Illustration Rahul, DNA

A Papal blunder

The Pope has courted controversy with a seemingly disturbing comment, the merit of which has now been subjected to a political debate in the nation which houses countless communities and its faceless followers.

For starters Pope Benedict XV1 has expressed Vatican’s concern over the ban on conversions in some States in India. While the Pope’s concern stems from the fact that the right to convert a person of particular faith into another is a fundamental one, opponents of Pope on the issue see his remarks as an interference in India’s internal affairs.

While Pope as the head of the Church is entitled to have his views on an issue which has the Christian missionaries at its core, his credentials as the head of the State of Vatican makes the comment an interference in the country’s affairs. Diplomatic decency dictates that no head of state can make a comment which may have the potential to be seen as a peep into another country’s internal affairs. The Pope fumbled by doing exactly this..

The issue is that the Pope’s remarks came while India’s ambassador to the Vatican, Amitava Triparthi presented his credentials, which makes it an official statement.

If the Pope had such concerns, it should have been driven home through diplomatic channels in a subtle manner.

Now, what has happened is that the Pope has given anti-conversion elements in the country a stick to beat the Christian community as a whole. The age-old tool which was used against Muslims – The parochial notion that Muslims were less patriotic and tends to back their religious mentors across the borders rather than putting their pride in the country – will now be raked up against the Christian populace.

The danger with this argument is that it has the quality to sway liberal voices. For some patriotism is an elixir which blindfolds them. They tend to fall prey to the traps of propaganda if a right mix of patriotism is packaged in any debate of national significance.

The Pope has unknowingly given a trigger to the anti-conversion elements.

The elusive legacy of Bose & its uneasy pursuit

As ghosts return to taunt the Netaji riddle, a flight of fiction into the political junkyards of its uneasy trail becomes inevitable


So Subhash Chandra Bose is having a hell of a time in his yet to be undisclosed grave, assuming that he is no more. A parliamentary panel has told the government that there was no reason to believe that the firebrand freedom fighter died in a plane crash in 1945, as is widely believed.

But the government, uneasy with anything to do with the ghosts of the past, has said it doesn't agree with the findings.

The Centre has also refused to toe the line of the Justice M K Mukherjee panel that the ashes in Renkoji Temple in Japan were not of Bose.

The Mukherjee panel was set up by the NDA government to showcase its affection for Marxist West Bengal, some believe. Anything related to Bose achieves a regional fervour which could be a trigger to a better political redemption, according to one school of thought.

And the NDA thought the best way to get a posting in the electoral roadmap of West Bengal was through a resurrection of the last journey of Bose, which is mystery at its shrouded best.

So the panel was named to probe the circumstances concerning departure of Bose from Bangkok in August 1945 and his subsequent disappearance.

The mystery remains unravelled and the political game plan behind it will have to wait a bit longer to even hope to bear fruits. While Bose remains a revered figure shrouded in the mystery of his disappearance, the political star gazers have failed to claim his legacy and subvert it into the ballot box of democracy.

May be it is a tribute to the fighter in Bose who wanted to overthrow the British with arms that no one could claim the legacy of the warrior in him. Not the Marxists who pillion rode into the altar of democracy after realising the futility of the oceans of blood shed by their unsuspecting comrades.

As for the Hindutva cheer leaders who wanted to make a dent in the Marxist bastion by digging up the chronicle of a missing nationalist, they failed to realise that Bose's brand of nationalism does not even have a remote link to the sham of "nationalism" which they preach without much success other than rousing passions of hatred and triggering a scattered mutiny of divisive forces in pockets of ignorance.

For the Congress, whose claim to the country's fortunes was extracted from a holy association which the Mahatma had with the party at a vantage point in history, everything uneasy is unwelcome. So the Congress would like to bury Netaji, not to rake up his last journey.

May be Netaji did a Houdini act to vanish from the geographical flashpoints of history, only to save himself from the ignominy of seeing his unparalleled legacy of conviction torn to shreds to make or mar subversive political agendas.

The Dasmunsi Code

As a nation, we are too much in awe of bans. Now we see the sword of Dasmunsi’s cinematic abilities looming over the much awaited The Da Vinci Code.

Dasmunsi’s sword, assisted by unsubstantiated fears of insecure fringe groups who proclaim themselves as the only representatives of believers around the globe, is now taking the form of a double-edged sword. It can cut both ways.

It can cut the joys of movie buffs into size. It can also smoothen the ruffled feathers of the only children of the Almighty, who have zero tolerance towards conflicting ideas, challenging notions and all and sundry which they see as a threat to the holy cocoon in which they live.

So when Catholics across the world will view Tom Hanks crack the Da Vinci Code, a motley group of self-proclaimed believers in the land of tolerance will rejoice. Their moment of truth comes from the ease with which a spineless Union Government bowed to their dictates to see a conspiracy angle in a movie.

So what if The Da Vinci Code is blasphemous itself? Will its screening crumble the mighty religion? If that is the case, then our clergy and its cohorts on the streets should rather ponder on how to resuscitate a crumbling kingdom of heaven from the tsunami of onslaughts it is set to face.

This farce of blasphemous indignation has been enacted across the world for so much time, whether it is Hussain’s nude paintings or Prophet cartoons or the Da Vinci Code row itself.

The common element in all these "heavens may fall" protests is the religious Right. And the hapless Dasmunsis who seek every reason to pamper any thing remotely connected to the most sought after endangered commodity in the country: Religious sentiment.

So we go on banning cow slaughter, religious conversions, text books, movies and books, while we bombard search engines with a wish list of all things which we ban. This is what the nation's founding fathers visualised as unity in diversity. Amen